26/10/10

The date marks the day which the two of us become couple. Supposedly, 26/10 will be the fourth time we celebrate our anniversary, too bad fate doesn't bring the two of us together. Thinking back, i really take you as granted.. Now i know, what is it like to lost a precious thing in one's life, this feeling of emptiness really sucks, no matter how many rounds of dota games i played, how many times i went into clubing in audi, that amount of time spent can't be even weight together as 1 second of the time we spent. I missed you, I shed tears for you, every single letter i typed, my heart ache as my mind draw our sweet memories back, i know, everyone is moving on, the world is rotating constantly, but for me,I am a little dull in accepting things. Hate this world, hate my life, everything forever doesn't flow smoothly for me, really wish that love can really FUCK OFF from this world. Some thirst for love, some evaded from love, while others stumbled upon crossing path with love, for me. I just want to have you back to my side. I know its totally out of the question for u, you're in love with him now, in real life, in game, both of you are destined to be as one, its ok. This time round, you'd be happy, even if someday he ditched you, i'll be waiting for you, for eternity, until you finally back to my side, Love is kind, love is a par on two, i will remember this. I wont hurt you, i wont snatch you away, i will just wait for u. Until the cherry ripes and drop from the tree. Love you as always, Happy 4th month anniversary ~Love. Lynn

Just another recount

There isn't much time left. Hussle up or i'll lose the battle.
Just a few days left before 'o' level examination, my feelings were of a real mess. I couldn't even tell what am i doing right now, i promised my baby, that i would focus all my attention all onto my studies, but that was what i said a month's ago and now i didn't even study anything yet. -.- I had a feeling that everyone else is going to be jumping with joy after they got back their results..and i will be alone looking at my shadow of my former self. Perhaps there is still 'time' left, and from the depths of my heart, i really want to do well for this time round. But, somehow..somewhat..i am just too lazy for anything.Everything. Sigh.
Yesterday was one of my blissful moments in my life! It was mid autum festival and some of my classmates and i were out to woodsland admirity waterfront park or how you spell that admirity word. Well there is like thirteen of us, after everyone was here, we set off to our destination at woodsland mrt station. While travelling on foot, some of them was doing some insane dance moves and the others were bascially cheering and some even sang. THe atomosphere was beyond any possible word to describe. It was...epik.. After many many thousands steps, we crossed republic poly, and reached admirity park. At there, we began to lit our candles and encast it with our lanterns. Then we stepped into the lair of nature. Our only source of vision was by the weak light that our lanturns produced. We truggled through the endlessly forest that paths was covered by stones and shebbles. On our way, we bypass a family of three that was too, strolling the park. Frog crocks, bird chips, nocturnal animals roam the night. After a lenghtly walk, we saw a way out of the forest and clearly as it seems, our destination was just a stone's throw away now. We soon joined the others that were celebrating the festival, after we found a spot, we left our bags there and off we go, to the web-like-obstacle which we have to climb by the ropes there to the summit of the obstacle course which was 3 feet estimated. Of course, i am not going to write the process of me reaching the summit, but what surprises me was that after i was seated down calming my frayed nerves, a lady(chiobu) was wearing a pink tee and a white mini skirt was up on the obstacle, i was amazing surprised by her presense, and the best part is, she's not even realising that her fans are all standing below her enjoying her raw view. I was one of her fans, but i chose to watch her in silent, after thirty minutes, she has reached the peak and when she is coming down, my eyes were enlarged as her skirt starts to slide up and down. Sigh after watching her for fourty minutes, i just realised she was wearing a pants inside. >.> FML lol. Afterwhich we part our paths and went back home.
MORAL OF THE STORY : FUCK MY LIFE.

Another recount

2days had past since my birthday, a lot have happened since then(refers to my last blog entry). Yeap i did it! My 'o' Mtrl exam got a B4(refers to marks that obtained between 61~64 marks), whee one less subject to study :) Also, i have gotten back my prelim results, English c5, maths d7, science d7, humanities c5, amaths f9. -.- Total disaster, i told myself. At this rate, i might even fail my national exams. Now i became very worried as my days were sallowed up by worries. 'Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday to Gavin, happy birthday to you!' I see everyone faces were glistened with smiles, there seated my parents, my mother in particular, sigh, my heart experienced eclipse when i see her singing the song loudest. Her eyes were filled with joy when her son turns 17, i can tell that she's expecting something. What an disappointment am i, never fails to bring a frown to my mom, and to all. I'm numbed by the luxury life i had and i enjoyed it so much so that i couldn't give a dam even i can't produce an 'o' level certificate to my boss next time when i'm looking for a job. A stone's throw away until the 'o' level exams, i spent my days with my computer or entertainments and nothing else. I had just received a call from my cousin earlier on and he sounded as if he's running out of time for preparations for his 'o'. Why is everyone so busy struggling to compile extra inch of knowledge into their heads, and why am i the one still so relaxed by my computer. I really wondered why.. It has been nearly a week already ever since that incident which turn my life upside down. I would never had imagined lynn would be with his ex boyfriend in lan together, i'd asked her umpteen times to lan with me, immediately a soundly NO came out from her mouth. Since then, i am totally in a vast land alone, not knowing where to walk as it seems endless no matter which route i would try. I looked into my inbox folder today, and i could count all the messages that i received from lynn using all my fingers, because it's not even more than 10. Why is this happening. She am i had talked it through and we made it very clear that i will never cross this line to reality in our relationship developments. I am so sadden when she doesn't wish for any more progress with me. Sometimes i would ask her why is she sad in the phone, but when we talked, she's like 'ok enuf already, i wanna do my things'. Back to the topic my sweats were bulleting out from my body when i looked at the time now, it's just 20mins more before i am going out to lan to overnight. Oh my.. i gasp, i didn't had enough rest already. i wonder what am i going to play without lynn by my side, maybe dota from 6pm~8am? Haiz...i wish i had my atm card, if so, lynn wouldn't had to be so disappointed when we reached the max love points we can get, i know she's been wanting to get over with cuphea ring but i just can't, i had no @cash. FML i wish i could be in love again, i always thought there's always love in the human realm, but why couldn't i feel it!
-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-FML-

Daily recount!!

TA MA DE LA...
Shows how angry or frustrated i am. Chinese 'O' Mtl exam is coming in two days time -.- , i dont' know how prepared am i or not...but one thing for sure, when i see the two TA MA DE LA examinators, my brain will be appearing ' ? ' . Haiz...think about the good side, after friday, my life will be completely cleansed with chinese SHITS (Y). On the other hand, in ten or twenty years time, life is going to envolve into a new degree, china market is going to be the biggest trading market in the world trade organisation(WTO) and then....I WILL NEED MY TA MA DE LA CHinese AGAIN NUUUUUUUUUUUUUOOOOOOOOOO o0o0o0o00o-.- ...

Kk audition life, aiyo these few days cant online pei this emo lynn, then she in the end went to madness, burn oil-burn oils-burn 1 litre oil-burn 10 litres oil-burn oil and reuse oil and increase oil and -.- but seriously yea, i am not confident of having relations anymore... sometimes there comes to a point of time whereby you'll feel hopeless of what you are doing which in my case was this so called couple in audition, well she have her bf, and i am like just a vessel to replace her audition bfs, well what i am trying to convey to her provided if shes fucking reading this is that I DONT MIND LA TA MA DE LA its just that you stop being emo can le GUAGUA :D and hor our purpose, to get max ring U_U ~.~

kk school life, as usual i talked alot, sms alot, kena insulted alot, critised alot, eat alot, shit alot, copy hw alot, nvr do hw d pile also alot, all in all its double mcspicy upsize -.- EL,Maths,Chinese,Physics,Biology,Social studies,History,Add.maths. Among all the subjects i can pass only bio ss history chinese and thats all (Y) O lvl coming, maths still not handled, if english fail also gg ite... which i dont want that to be happening, also i wish i could have the confident to ask the girl that is seated near me for her help, zzz fuck mans, why do they have to be shy when they were about to talk to their cup of tea. TA MA DE LA -.-

Kk home life, -.- nth to say, mom's rage bar[##@!@!!#!$!%#@@!&@*!@&*99.99%/100%]

KK outside life so called Lan shop life, this entire week have not been to any fucking lan shops, TA MA DE LA -.- credits to MT oral, my school, mom for giving birth to me, mother nature for having lands to be built for schools and also big bang for having all the 9 planets which includes this tee hee earth...

Others: Love relation - I like lynn the like bar is now [50/100] about to level up to LOVE (Y) thats for audition. but seriously i dun mind girls that are older to me!!! to me girls that are older than me means that they are both mentally matured and physically matured, i dont care how or what you look like, who cares about if youre a chio bu? Your face is only concern when you're out for an job interview. Your inner beauty means the world to me, so really (Y) ..

Love releations(in real life) currently my target is same class wif me and everyday see her stare at her look at her see her back view her shadow and her smile makes me feel so satifised :D and then there are times where i dreamt about me and her together married have kids leading a happy and peaceful life, but in reality its totally out of the question...-.- fml for being so fat D: i wish i could have a perfect figure and looks, but im so fk lazy -.- TA MA DE LA -.-lll

kk in conclusion so called the moral of the post :D
To love someone is to really have a mutal understanding of each other and put your heart soul mind and body into this releationship and the rest is all about $ matters.